WHEN IS  A PERSON TOO OLD TO GET MARRIED?

A male reader sent in the question 'What age should be considered too old to get married?'

I suggest that the following questions should be seriously considered in coming to an answer to this question:

Whether or not the partner you are considering is a genuine believer [the Bible forbids marriage to unbelievers (2Corinthians 6:14-17)]

Whether or not getting married will increase or reduce your ability to glorify God and serve God [the Bible instructs us that we should glorify God in everything we do (1Corinthians 10:31)]. Paul's instructions in 1Corinthians 7:1-40 encourage celibacy for those who can handle it, in order to serve the Lord without distraction.

What is your real motive in considering marriage?

What advice are those who know and love you giving you about this question?

Are you contemplating marriage simply to have your needs [emotional, financial, physical, daily care, etc] met? This is a very shaky basis for marriage at any age; it makes the relationship dependent on the ability of the partner to meet the needs to the other ... which as age increases is very likely to become less and less, and the basis of the relationship crumbles.

What are your expectations of the contemplated marriage, and are these expectations based on reality or on wishful thinking? Unrealistic expectations lead to disappointment and frustration. The older a person is the more difficult it usually is to adapt.

Looking at it from the perspective of the proposed partner - would it actually be the best thing for her to be married to you? Or would it place heavy burdens on her that no one who loved her would want her to have to bear?

Looking at it from your perspective - how well do you actually know this person, and how long have you known her? It is common for people getting on in years to lose a certain amount of their normal discernment and make inappropriate decisions that can cause trouble for them and others. That is why the fourth point above is very important.

Above all, as a Christian, and regardless of how old you are, you need to say to the Lord 'your will be done on earth as it is in heaven' and honestly set yourself both to seek the Lord's direction and be willing to submit to that will.

© Rosemary Bardsley 2015